Untitled

I hate the fact that I’m awake when no one else is because my brain won’t stop torturing me with all of my worst fears.
I hate that I feel unloved and alone.
I hate that no one wants to love me…
I hate that I feel this way but I feel like there is nothing that I can do about it. I feel like I’m falling in a downword spiral of impending doom and as my nails scrape off from me trying to keep myself from falling further I break my wrists and fall flat on my face. Unable to stop anything from happening. And as I lie there in agony wishing for death to become me it does not, it lies waiting and watching. Figuring out my every fault, my every mistake. So no matter which way I decide to run I can never hide. Forever knowing he is following me yet never knowing when he is going to strike, I go through life in a state of agonizing paranoia. Waiting for the inevitable.
(I wrote this to describe how I’m feeling, it’s 100% all my thoughts, so fuck off if u don’t like it) - brittney.